My creativity has been AWOL as of late.... I can't form a coherent image from an idea, and if I do, it looks like complete shit and gets ripped out of the sketchbook. I have soooo many cool idea because I've been listening to Muse (did they steal it? lol) lately, and they always inspire some of the most epic images in my head.

I just did a drawing of a more gothy Kitsu playing guitar with wires attached to her back and hands seemingly keeping her alive set to the idea of "Plug In Baby" (My plug in baby Crucifies my enemies), and you know what I think of it?

IT LOOKS LIKE PURE UNADULTERATED SHIT!!!!!

*sigh* I don't know if it's because I've been having a battle in my head over some personal emotional/mental stuff, because of work, or just a downward slope on the usual roller coaster of creativity, but it's really starting to piss me off. *is voting on either the first one or the last one since she sketches character designs at work on receipt paper*

Guess I just had to get it out somewhere. Maybe someone will actually read this.. If so..

Please help me.... *wanders off to ponder the universe as normal when she's depressed/uncreative*

*sigh*

After spending the past couple of days at my mom's house, I've come to realize I realize that I miss it. A lot. Not to mention most of my allergy problems are coming from the lingering stench of smoke in this house.

So, with two days off next week and if all goes according to plan, I am moving out of this trash-hole and moving down to mom's. Sure, it's almost an hour from school and even longer from John's, but it's worth it.

I felt so wanted and loved at mom's, something I've only felt once before and that's when I'm with John.

Not to mention, at this shithole, I can hardly breathe because of all the lingering smoke in the walls and everything. I have a headache too, had one since I walked in last night.

So I'm going to talk to mom about moving in next week. I'm bringing this computer with me, so I won't lose anything. ^^ She wants to network this computer and hers together, but I just said we could use it as the main computer. *shrugs* Got to make a new user on here though. I'm paranoid like that. *shifty eyes*

Anywho... I'm hoping everything goes well enough that I can move in next week. I'm only down here at dad's because I need this computer and I have a half a tank of gas to last me until pay day next week. ^^;;;

So, I guess I am off to go get ready for work. Ciao!

Tee hee

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEE!!!!!

I'm 20 motherfuckers!!!

And I sure as hell don't act like it!! XDD

W00T FOR GUITAR HERO METALLICA!

Weee!!!!

I have a job interview tomorrow at the Walmart my mom works at!!!! It's at nine in the morning, so I'm missing class, but I wasn't going anyways because it's my birthday. XDD I'm turning 20!!!!


But that's not why I'm posting this on here. Oh no, there's a story behind this that kind of pisses me the fuck off. It obviously involves dad.

Now, I don't think I've ranted about him on here before, but he is an asshole. He has been since he married my step-mom Cindy. Before that he was actually nice to me and my brother. Now, all he does is put me down, treats me like a five year old, and never says anything nice to me or about something I tell him I've accomplished. Which is where I begin.

After I talked to Cindy from personnel, I went into the kitchen to tell him the good news. I figured he'd like to know, and actually be happy about it. Him and my step mom were looking at some order thing for another Steeler's stadium statue or whatever that costs $80+, when he says they have no money. Back on subject. I told him I had an interview at walmart, he asked if it was my step mom's walmart. I shook my head and said it was my mom's. This is exactly what he said....

"Oh. What was that thing from the unemployment office you got yesterday?"

-_-

No "congrats" or "hope you get it" just a question on what this thing I got in the mail was.... Which I don't get unemployment because I quit my job, but it was worth a shot. *awesomeface*

I'm sure if I had said it was my step-mom's walmart, which she is on the lowest rung of the ladder above cart pushers (because she "can't because of her heart and back" ... Cry me a river...) he would have been esctatic. Nope, it's my mom's store and it's something I'm doing, so he's not happy about it at all....

Seriously, if he thinks the way he treats me and my brother is "tough love", then he's soooooo going to regret his ignoring me and treating me like shit by telling me I'll never amount to nothing with my drawings and photography and how I should have gone into the military because of my "bad character". John and I have both agreed that he's never going to find out when we get engaged, get married, or see our kids because he'll be exactly the same ten-fifteen years from now.

On a lighter note.... I'm attending a free Blender tutorial at school on Thursday. XDD Will (my technology teacher who is cool enough to let us call him by his first name) and Kevin (a fellow classmate and friend) have been trying really hard to get me into using Blender (a free 3D software used by everyone). It all started by Will seeing some of my drawings yesterday and asked if I used Blender. I said no and he jumped on me to start learning it.

He has inspired me to do what I have ALWAYS wanted to do. I've always wanted to be an animator, anime or video game, but my dad has always told me there's no place in the world for that and that I'll amount to nothing (see what I mean by he always puts me down?) Well.... Will has gotten me back onto it. I'm not going to be on my deathbed, having worked a dead-end job my whole life, and look back saying "I wish I had done that".

Hence, the class I am taking. John is coming with me as well, because he wants to do video game design as well and has played with Blender a little, but hasn't touched it in quite some time.

*dance* I can't wait!!!!! I'm so excited about the next two days I'm bouncing off the walls!!!! I just had to vent about my asshole dad first. XDD Tomorrow's my birthday too, so HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!!

I'm off to take a shower now and call my foxie to wake him up. *giggle* Ciao!

Also: I put down my deposit for Rock Band: The Beatles! XDD If I get the job, I'm changing my deposit over to the whole instrument set instead of just the game. John needs the instruments and I need a mic so I can SING!!!!! *hasn't had a mic because it might be down in Atlanta still from FWA* ^^;;;

This weekend's been great!

Just had to get this out of my system. XDD

Saturday my aunt bought me the movie Bolt as an early birthday gift. *dances* I love Bolt! The same day my Federal tax return came in!

Today, I went and cashed my check, put aside a lot for bills, and treated myself to a game for my DS. Oh yes.. That means I could have only gotten one thing... Pokemon Platinum!!!! Special edition too!!!

WOOO HOOOO!!!!

*nerd from hell*

Anywho... XDD I'm off to play more pokemon!!! Ciao!

FWA!!!

OMG!!!! I had the BEST time at FWA!!!!

I was scared driving up to John's and on the way down to Atlanta. I was scared that no one there would talk to me or like me, and that I might not like it. Oh man was I wrong! I walked in and split off from John to go see my first real-life fursuiters, and ran into a woman and her coyote pawpet and her group she came with (minus her boyfriend who drove the whole way). Kata'lina was so wonderfully nice! She later introduced me to JTigerclaw (also known as Jon or JT), her boyfriend. He's in the first pic. Kat was a cat (haha, I made a bad joke) and JT is a tiger with a partial fursuit (which was ADORABLE!). Kat invited me to her forum, and JT gave me a card with his webcomic on it.

Sooo many fursuiters! I got hugs from SO MANY!!!! Met one that had squeakers in his paws, and another with squeakers in his feet. LOL!

I played a bunch of card games I have grown to adore like Apples to Apples and 1000 Blank White Cards. XD We started a game of Zombie Fluxx, Rikkanis, Maxis, John, and myself, but it ended so we could all play Werewolves of Miller's Hallow. John, Justin, William (who isn't a furry but drove us because he finds cons fun), and myself won the Rock Band tournament!!! BY A LANDSLIDE! *dansen*

Shared a bed with John, and it was so wonderful. I never felt so relaxed in my sleep in my life. I didn't even have my dream catcher (which I need to keep away the bad dreams and nightmares I have all the time).

Jack Sparrow was there! XD With a ninja on his tail the whole time. You'd see them randomly fighting in the main hall throughout the whole con, then make up and start talking. Conservators' Center Inc was there with four Serval brothers to teach people about saving wild animals whom their owners can't take care of anymore or are seized by the government. The Servals were actually 9 months old and born from a female they got from an older woman who couldn't take care of her anymore because of medical problems. They were so cute! Especially the most hyper one Sammy (pictured). He was so sweet too.

We made so many friends. *giggle* We got to have lunch with 2 the Ranting Gryphon, famous comedian in the furry community, in the food court at Peachtree Center (where we had lunch every day. XD) He came up and sat next to us and we all just started talking. He is a really down to earth and nice person. Also got to talk to his friend and fellow comedian Uncle Kage. John got his picture taken with 2 on the last day.

Things I Learned at FWA
- I kick ASS at Rock Band
- I want a fursuit. A partial would be best. ^^ Kind of like JT's tiger suit.
And most of all...
- I am so proud to be a furry. I will forever wear my tail ourside of work and school as well as mu collar.

Guess I better explain some of the pics. XD

Also....

Badly Drawn Kitties

People need to check out this comic. XDD It's hysterical. Oh, the story of my life...

Bored

Spring Break is over, so I have a reason to not be home once again. Yay! I'm tired of people pestering me to go to the unemployment office. I hope my tax return comes in very early this week, so I have money for FWA and to pay bills with for a while until something does come up.

Just my little thoughts that have ran through my head all morning as I eat my Easy Mac and drink RC cola...

Ciao.

zOMG!!!

My life has yet again become all-consumed by Gaia Online's MMO zOMG. I was up until 3:30 last night playing this game, trying to beat a boss. *sigh* I failed, so I'm leveling up some new rings I bought that would help. ^-^ Duct Tape is an amazing ring, puts people to sleep. XDD

I'm Kitsuneyasha, the blue little kitsune on there with a gun, shooting a Taiko Drum. =3

Anyways... Guess I just had to say this. XD And my mouth is hurting, don't know why, but it is... Taking ibuprophin for it and it helps.

OFF TO KILL TAIKO DRUMS AND KOKESHI DOLLS!!!!! BWAHAHAHA!

For Heaven's Sake...

I don't see why people have the need to put the most horrid and downright ugly pictures of themselves as avatars... I usually don't talk smack about people, but this one girl (if you can call her that) on FurAffinity has the most HORRIBLE looking avatar... >< Scared me for a minute because John started watching her profile, but further investigation made me realize it was because of a comic she had started. -___- Scared the PISS out of me because I know the boy has better art tastes, but the comic is funny and much better drawn than her other work...

Like I said, I usually don't do that, but I have never been made physically sick by someone's avatar, and of their face none the less.

Anyways... Now that I have that out of my system. This week is spring break, and I have been nothing but lazy as fuck. Waiting for Lowe's to call, hoping the call after FWA so I don't have to lie and say "I'm going to be out of town next weekend because of some family stuff that I need to be at." *sigh* Still thought about not going, but John and Justin both want me to go with them really really bad. *sigh again*

I just don't know... I'm stressing myself again.

I've got to get ready and go down to Granny's house. Maybe something will happen today to cheer me up. I'm feeling way down in the dumps.

Beginning of a New Blog

Yep.... I've broken down and created a Blogspot blog. God, this will take some getting used to. I'm used to Livejournal.

Of course, I haven't been on LJ in forever. XDD

Maybe this one will be different. *shrugs*

You can expect little rants on things, streams of consciousness, songs (if I EVER write another), poems, and maybe a little wannabe article on something I've taken a picture of... *shrugs* We'll see...

Time for the random subject!

FWA coming up in a few weeks! *dances* FWA = Furry Weekend Atlanta. I am a furry, and not the kind to screw dogs or screw other furries in a suit. Hell, I don't even own a fursuit! Anywho... FWA is coming up soon, and I was talked into it by my boyfriend and his friend. A whole weekend surrounded by other furries, and plenty of friendly fursuiters for me to glomp! XDD Art out the ass, gaming out the ass, lectures on how to create your own fursuit (I said I didn't own one, not that I didn't want one), and finally 2 the Ranting Gryphon will be there! YAY!

I'm looking forward to it so much. Lots of photography opportunities, maybe my first rave (I know not to eat or drink ANYTHING), and maybe my project in Mass Communications class will be based on my photos and a review of the three days. ^-^ I love being a photojournalist. Telling stories through my pictures.

And believe me, I will post some pictures.

There is a small chance that I won't be able to because of a hopefully soon-to-be job at Lowe's... *shrugs* They should understand that the trip is already paid for. =3

I'm out... Going to scrounge up some food and see if there is anything decent to watch on TV... *sigh* Probably end up playing Pokemon Pearl anyways.

Oh yeah...

I GOT A REGIGEGAS!!!! XDDDDD

*nerd*

Ciao!